Posted on Jun 28, 2018
By Ellie Laks, Founder of The Gentle Barn
I had a wonderful experience this morning that reminded me of being a kid all over again. When I was a child there were so many times when I had the impulse to walk down a different path to the lake or go over to a certain tree, and every time I followed those instincts there would be an animal who needed help. This morning was no different!
Each morning early, I let my dogs outside to use the bathroom, and while they are outside doing their thing, I go back upstairs to get dressed, meditate, and get ready for the day. Today, however, I let them out and turned to go back upstairs, but instead had the feeling that I should go outside. I didn’t know why, but I followed my intuition. I felt pulled to the pool, so I went over to have a look inside. Sure enough, there was a baby bird stuck in the water, drowning. His head was still out of the water and he was able to breath but had I arrived minutes later, he would have sunk.
I pulled the baby bird out of the water and then didn’t really know what to do with him. He was breathing heavy, but I didn’t know if that was because he had aspirated, or if he was in shock in my embrace? So, I asked, “what should I do now to help him?” And the answer came to my thoughts immediately: “Put him down in the sun and walk away”. I again trusted my instincts and did as I was instructed. I watched from the window and once I was out of sight, the fledgling started calming down, drying off, and his breathing returned to normal. And then just like that, he flew away.
It would have been so easy to ignore the impulses this morning and go back to bed or take a shower. But I have had a lifetime of experience where I was taught over and over again to always trust my instincts. One time I even pulled off the freeway, nowhere close to home, in a not so great neighborhood, and found a dog in the middle of the road who had been hit by a car. I cannot think of one single time where I followed my impulses and found nothing. But I can think of multiple times where I didn’t trust my instincts and regretted it deeply! The time that haunts me the most was years ago when we had a lovely goat named Divine who could not walk. She was as happy as can be though and loved her job with children at The Gentle Barn, enjoyed receiving love from our staff, volunteers, and guests, ate with such pleasure and was full of life. The veterinarians wanted to take her into the hospital for treatment, and I had a terrible feeling about it. They assured me it was safe, but I kept feeling like Divine was happy and didn’t want help to walk. But they kept pressuring me, and seeing them as the experts, I ignored my intuition and brought her to the hospital. I felt sick to my stomach when I dropped her off, even though they kept reassuring me. And a few hours later they called me saying that Divine had passed away from the medication. I cried for days. I missed her smile, he bright sparkling eyes, and her throaty voice when she called to me. But most of all, I was full of regret knowing I should have listened to that still small voice inside of me!
Divine’s ashes arrived a few weeks later with a heart on the box with Divine’s name on it, that I made into a necklace. I wear it to remind me to always trust my instincts. We all have intuition, and we all are taught in our society to ignore them. We are taught that the only things that exist are the things we can see, touch and prove; but there is so much more, that animals naturally have and believe in. If we can just open our hearts to love everyone and everything. If we could just listen to that still, small voice inside of us that guides us. And if we could only know that it is the things that we cannot see or prove that is the most important. Can you imagine what life could be like for all of us?! In the meantime, there is a small, brown, brave, bird flying around my backyard chirping and loving life right now because I trusted my instincts, and that is a start!